Experimentation & CheapThrills

( after the homeboy dayz)

Ok, so i'm finally making my way past my Gang-banging days, and now smoking the good shit(back then) and buying kilos(around 2 Lbs). I smoked and drank most of my profits ! (Remember Up In Smoke? the albums baby!)

It was the 70s and i was now getting into my "Stoner" Mode. Zeplin, Pink floyd and Sabbath were now replacing my Oldie But Goodies, which i just got burnt out on... but i can still call it and by who, most of the time these days.

Dropping a hit of acid (purple micro-dot,orange sunshine,window pane, etc.) and frying real good was pretty cool til the not so cool bad trips started to hit close to home. Not with me so much but with a buddy or two. And with that, it killed it... it wasn't such a good high anymore.

Twice we all came close to death. First we were on the freeway and the friend suddenly grabs the steering wheel and wouldn't let go! We slamed on the brakes and slid right up to the edge of a guard rail, if we kept going we would have went over and way down.

The second and last time we were in my friends dad's car going down San Fernando Rd.
The streets were wet from rain and this time i was in the front seat. He asks me to hold the wheel as he lights a smoke, HE not realizing i was frying at the time.

So i did and it was cool....til the road up ahead starts to bend, but i still kept the car going straight (?). He looked up and saw that i wasn't going with the road and grabbed the wheel (here we go again!) but in doing so he over-reacted and we went into a slooow-motion spin.
Round and round we went til the very first parked car decided to get in our way! And that car? It had friends! We got aquainted with them also...they kicked our car's ass! All 4 of them but wait.....
There was still more of mr. Toads Wild ride to come!
The last thing we hit was a TRUCK ! The rear corner of it met me at my door... HARD! That did me in!

Of course not until the building! What building? Oh....
Just the one we went into. The good thing? It stopped us! The bad thing ? (for me) After i managed to some how crawl out the window, I dropped to the floor and laid there unable to breath.
I did crawl out to the front entrance of the building but couldn't go any farther, so i just laid there and in my mind pictured ....me.... Dying! Still unable to breath ,which seemed like an eternity! I had no idea where anyone else was, just me on the cold wet ground....waiting.

There was nothing else to do and i tried over and over to catch my breath but nothing!... so i waited.
I started to feel light-headed and numb and the very last thing i was looking at were the streetlights.
My last feeble attempt to somehow breath wasn't working , but i felt a little rush of air come in and then alittle more and alittle more til i finally was able to catch my full breath!! BUT not without a real
dull aching pain in my right lower side.

Needless to say THAT was the last time i wanted to fry. As for my side? Only some bruised ribs!
What, no broken ones? It still felt like they were, every time i had to breath!... but none!
I really lucked out once again. You know, there are those who always say " With my luck..."
Well i was the one who had the "good luck" in many many cases. And with that i'll shut up!
hehe
I won't even go into the over-dose on downers (reds) that i took while in a jail cell at Rampart!
Who hasn't done that! (just kidding!)


________________________________

*Revelation
~ by Homegirl

People get so caught up in all the bad that they ignore the good.
All the stressing prevents living life the way you should.
An exception to this I am not.

In depression's lonely web, I am caught.
The harder that I struggle, the more wrapped up I get.
Alone in the dark I sit and I fret,

Impatient for the day I'm actually happy to wake.
I'm tired of always acting so fake.
Behind every smile exists an ocean of tears.
It's scary how good I've gotten at hiding my fears.
I have so many things to be thankful for,
But yet I'm so selfish, I only plead for more.

What I need to do is open my eyes and see
That this world is far from owing me.
I've dug this grave of mine.
I act as though being happy is a crime.
I dwell on all the bad that's happened to me.
Once I move on, I'll finally be free.

I'll be free to grow wings and finally fly.
I'll be able to actually enjoy the time as it goes by.
So here I go; I'm taking the leap.
I'm going to stand strong and not allow my own defeat.

- Homegirl